Mario Lopez Is A Tool - Continued

Seriously? He is eating his birthday cake with a shirtless picture of himself on it? I hope that picture is from the official Mario Lopez Calendar, 2009 because if it's from 2010 it's going to ruin the surprise and thus my entire, fucking YEAR!

Picture from - http://www.people.com/people/gallery/0,,20310295,00.html#20685141

I'd Want to Claw My Face Off Too

Lindsay Lohan.......*sigh. Let's just evaluate her life to date:

1. Her body has been destroyed by drugs and booze.
2. She doesn't have a career and the last work she was offered, The Hangover, she turned down.
3. Her dad is Michael Lohan and her mom is Dina Lohan.
4. The four trips to rehab didn't work, here's hoping the fifth will work.
5. She has been dumped by a girl that looks like the crypt keeper.
6. Her last film went straight to the ABC Family Channel.

Now let's add failed fashion consultant:

Lindsay Lohan's debut collection as Ungaro's 'artistic advisor' walked the Paris runway on Sunday.

The LA Times said, “Nothing in the collection evidenced any real skill or discernible design work … there’s really no defending this misguided collection, other than as a desperate bid for attention from a house that hasn’t mattered since its founder retired in 2004.”

The London Telegraph said, “There were some truly hideous fashion faux pas. Silver sequinned ‘pasties’, for example, belong in a lap dancing club.”

Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/04/lindsay-lohan-debuts-coll_n_309099.html

Yeah, I'd be boozing, sexing and drugging it up too.

Fully Story and Picture - http://www.wwtdd.com/2009/10/the-reviews-are-in-lindsay-officially-sucks-at-fashion-too/

Dirty Jersey Is Back!

This has to be the best news I'm going to hear all day-

The Housewives of New Jersey's season 2 will air in 2010, but the network hasn't announced which of the women from the first season — Danielle Staub , Dina Manzo, Jacqueline Laurita, Teresa Giudice and Caroline Manzo — will be back.
Full story on People.com

This show is fucking amazing - mobster wives, drugs, prostitutes, bad plastic surgery, Italian tempers, strip clubs and car washes. Need I say more?

Danielle, Dina, Teresa and Caroline HAVE to come back on the show otherwise it's going to suck. Jacqueline is kind of like that nice but incredible stupid friend that really never needs to be there for you to have fun. You spend so much time telling them to stop looking at imaginary butterflies and to finish their fucking drink so you all can go to the next bar. Ultimately it just fucks with the momentum of the night. I'm here to get drunk and make bad decisions with some random guy at the end of the bar; I'm definitely not trying to host a field trip from the mental institution..

Yeah, Jacqueline can go and I'm not going to be that upset.


Picture from - http://bitterqueen.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8342adfcf53ef0112797ade6228a4-800wi

Lift With Your Legs, Boys

Jesus, Mariah, what the fuck have you been eating? Both of those dudes (meaning MORE than one large, full grown man) seem pretty ripped but I can see the strain and hurt in their eyes. At least she can sing, what's your excuse Aubrey O'Day?

Photo from - http://thesuperficial.com/2009/10/mariah_careys_dancers_look_rea.php

How To Make A Bitch Look Good By Bitch-Tits

Bitch-Tits needs to get punched in the nuts ASAP because 1.) there needs to be some blunt-force trauma to his groin to prevent him from ever reproducing again and 2.) hard work should never go unnoticed. Kate is a bitch but she's fucking got nothing on Bitch-Tits.

Jon could be found in contempt of court for the unauthorized withdrawal of $200,000 from the couple's joint bank account, Kate Gosselin's attorney tells PEOPLE. According to singer, Kate learned about the withdrawal after receiving overdraft notices regarding her joint account with her estranged husband. When she inquired with the bank, she was told Jon had removed $200,000, leaving only about $1,000 in the account.

Full story at http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20310103,00.html

There is no coming back for Jon. He's fucked up his reputation, his kids, his sponsors, his body and he's fucked Hailey Glassman so I'm sure he'll test positive for HIV sometime in the near future.

Photo from - http://dlisted.com/node?page=1

Happy Monday

Apparently, the ginger that plays Ron Weasley owns about $15 million dollars worth of real estate.

The Mail revealed that he owns two country mansions and co-owns another sizable detached home.

And the value of the mortgage-free portfolio? A cool 9.2 million pounds.

According to Land Registry documents Grint paid 5.4 million pounds on September 9th to become the sole owner of an 18th-century Hertfordshire manor house in 22 acres.

I don't even have my own cubicle at work. I have to share a desk with coworker who's constant hard-on for Tom Brady and the Red Soxs damn near pokes me in the back every time he turns around.

God, I feel like a failure. I don't even have a spot on my desk to have a framed picture of me with my imaginary friends and boyfriend all of whom I found on an Abercrombie ad. At this rate, I should start looking at upgrading to a cardboard box from Staples. Monday just got a lot more depressing.

Picture From and Full story - http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1217782/Weasley-does-Harry-Potter-star-Rupert-Grint-21-9-2m-property-empire.html#ixzz0T66vO3PS

Fatty Can Run but Fatty Can't Hide

I'm in NYC this weekend and I'm on a mission to find Jon Gosselin. I don't even know if he's in the city this weekend but the only reason I'm walking my fat ass around for six hours a day is to hopefully find Bitch-Tits and tell him he's a douche to his face. Some of you might think it's mean but let me just remind you that he pays $5,000 per month for his apartment in NYC and has EIGHT CHILDREN.
Picture from - http://corruptsocietyfanart.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/untitled-6-1.jpg