Helen Keller Is A Liar

One of the contributing editors wanted to share her thoughts on some very important issues - Helen Keller and STDs. In the interest of diversifying the Poop League and maybe touching on some topical issues, I give you this post and the next one by Uki Girl.

Washington (CNN) - A bronze statue of Helen Keller was unveiled at the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday as lawmakers praised her as a trailblazer and an inspiration for those with disabilities. The statue shows Keller - who lost her sight and hearing to illness when she was 19 months old - standing at a water pump as a 7-year-old, a look of recognition on her face as water streams into her hand. It depicts the moment in 1887 when teacher Anne Sullivan spelled "W-A-T-E-R" into one of the child's hands as she held the other under the pump. It's the moment when Keller realized meanings were hidden in the manual alphabet shapes Sullivan had taught her to make with her hands.

Let me preface this by saying that I am fully aware that I'm going straight to hell. With that being said, am I the only one that thinks the Helen Keller thing is crap? Just think about it....this girl can't hear, can't see, can't talk (which goes without saying...excuse the pun), and it's also 18 fucking 87. There is no way in hell that she can gain a full understanding of the English language by some woman rubbing patterns on her hand! I mean really, how does one make the connection between "what the f is this woman doing to my palm" and "oh, water! Clearly that's what she's trying to tell me!". I'm sorry, but I don't buy it. I'm 24, and trying to learn Ukrainian after already speaking 2 other languages and hearing Ukrainian around me my whole life is balls hards. I have a hard time believing that in a time not long after the fucking Gold Rush such a miracle could occur. Just sayin.

Picture from - http://contracostabootcamp.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/helen-keller.jpg